I thought I could sleep early tonight. But I forgot to turn off the computer and TV so I had to get up again. Instead of trying to fall asleep again, I watched a movie on TV. The Dawn of the Dead. Good film just like 28 Days Later. A modern time zombie with so much better special effect.
Then I watched Globe Trekker. Spending the sleepless night with Ian Wright. I just love this man. He’s just so hilarious, the way he acts, the way he talks. Such a fun adventurer. I envy him so much for around the world trekking he does. First time I saw him, I was curious about him right away. Who is this guy? He’s not that handsome to my standard, but absolutely so interesting and attractive. So crazy. So funny. He brings me back my laughter.
I was so sad and in pain. Everyday was getting harder and harder. But with help from my friends, I’m finally back on my track again. I think. As for myself, I finally managed to at least trying to get over it. Step by step. It’s hard. It takes time. Because love, as my friend Christian once said, love is not a light bulb that goes on and off and on and off. And I shouldn’t mistake intensity for true love. True big love is compassion. It is the slow hot fire, not an explosion.
I’ll be alright. I might still going to shed a tear. But I’ll get through this. Someday. Somehow. And no, I’m not alone. That’s what Robin always says. I’ve found true good friends who have been helping me with this. Those who are near. Those who are thousand miles away.
I might be back on chapter one again. Even probably I have to read the introduction of the book again. But maybe that’s it. I do need to understand more about this life. About love. So many broken hearts, so there could be something which is not right yet.
So, who is my Mr. Right? I don’t know when, how or where I’m going to meet him. But I’ll keep on searching. And it’s officially on again now!
